Is my son's name really that strange?

Forgive us for not naming our son something simple, like Bob or Bill or Walter: we chose Liam. Let's say it together, "Lee-um." Not that difficult, right? Well, Grant and I didn't think so - then we moved to Hobbs. It's like a foreign name here. Ok, technically, it is an Irish name but I have heard it used plenty in the US. Hellooooooooo - Liam Neeson!! Even though he isn't an American, hasn't EVERYONE seen Shindler's List or seen his name in our country's beloved celebrity magazines at some point?

Most of the people in the northern part of the state got it. When we told someone Liam's name many would say that they knew of another little boy named Liam. Some said, "Oh! A good Irish name!" Others said, "Yeah! Like Liam Neeson!" At some point I learned that Tori Spelling had named her son Liam too - which does doc the name a few points but proves it's not unheard of. Some people did pronounce it, "Lye-um," (like at the doctor's office) when they read it before they heard us pronounce it.

Since moving closer to Texas (yes, I will place a little blame there) people are not able to repeat what we have said when we introduce Liam. We say, "This is Liam (Lee-um)," and in response we have heard several things: "Lum," "Lim," "William (which is where Liam comes from, but still not what we said to them)," "Lime." Still, when someone reads the name before we say it, they pronounce it, "Lye-um."

A few weeks ago I was speaking to a woman who has recently moved to Hobbs from The Netherlands and I told her about Liam. The woman said she has a friend with a son named Liam and that it is a good name because it is so easy to pronounce. HA! Imagine that. Maybe that does verify that it is a foreign name - foreign enough to not be easily understood in the southeastern corner of New Mexico anyway. There is at least one other little boy here named Liam, so there is hope!

Craig's List

I've heard of Craig and his list but I've never checked it out...I've got my own lists to keep up with for Pete's sake. Anyway, since I've got time to kill (at midnight, which I'll regret the first time Liam wakes up tonight) I decided to check it out since we'll need to find a reasonably priced refrigerator in reasonably priced condition. Craig is a smart, smart man. The people listing things for him, however, I would just say they're...um...creative, or maybe hopeful, or really just very eager to rid of their loot.

The adjectives these people use are misleading and I'm not sure why they think it's a good idea because it makes you click on the link and look at the pictures and react like there's suddenly a bug on your lap (if you don't react the way I do to unwelcome crawly critters then insert your own analogy...I think you know what I'm getting at). "Rustic" table does not sum up the proper description: "Beat-to-shit and unloved" table. "Designer" sofa? Really? Can you give me the designer's name? I'm pretty sure I saw the very same sofa at Big Lots.

CRIPES! A MOTH JUST DIVE-BOMBED MY LEG! I'm fine.

"1950s" coffee table...well, they really mean it but it's just a really old, ugly coffee table in crappy condition. "Eclectic collection of books" was a description a guy from Santa Fe used for his crap-ton of random books. Just because you're from Santa Fe and you have an assortment of crap, doesn't mean it is (or you are) eclectic. In fact, I have just now decided to no longer use that word; I feel about "eclectic" the way my best friend Katie feels about "plethora."

OH DEAR LEONARD!! NOW IT'S ONE OF THOSE CRAZY FLYING ANTS THAT NEVER DIE!! I stunned him (or her).

I am done with Craig's List for now. I must sleep. Tomorrow: Craig's List from Lubbock.

Thanks again Craig.

Looking for a little woo

I feel like my "woo" has gone. I use to have the ability to woo people I met. Be it a funny one-liner, a witty comment or some kind of snappy remark - somehow I could give people a good tickle. I think I'm out of woo. I give it a shot sometimes and get one of those wide-mouth, head back "ooooookay..." kind of laughs. After I'm out of the awkward spotlight, I give one of those "what was I thinking" eye-rolls to the ground around me as I get back to what I was doing. I find this usually happens in waiting rooms. It makes me feel like a fool but I've learned to shrug it off quickly. I wonder if I'm just not able to snap to it like I used to or if I've always been a little cooky and I'm just now getting the memo.

Maybe I was that girl and thought I was a lot funnier than everyone around me did. Anyway, it'd be nice to get a dose of woo and fire-off something worth a real laugh next time I'm trying lighten the mood or break the awkward silence around me. Is this what makes people turn bitter? Not being able to make jokes anymore? I'm not giving up. Maybe just treading water in my own awkwardness the next time I take a stab at it will help make some stranger's day.

Moments Alone

I would love to have a day when the only person I need to worry about is myself. Some might call me selfish, but I think I'm just normal. Anyone that disagrees is, in my opinion, selfish for thinking they're right and I'm wrong. Anyway, enough finger-pointing but I feel a little guilty for feeling the way I feel. Maybe I feel guilty because for 25 years I didn't have to worry about anyone but me and after just a year+ as a wife and less as a mom I crave time for me, me, ME!!!

I think some might confuse this, like I don't love my son or my husband enough, but that isn't the case. One might say it's because I was an only child and didn't really learn how to worry about others except on their birthdays and some holidays, fair enough. Contrary to the opinions of others which, unfortunately, I pay too much attention to, I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO FEEL SELFISH FOR WANTING ME-TIME!!

Breastfeeding is the big one. I know it's the best for Liam...I'm a breastfeeding counselor for crying out loud, but the kid wants to nurse-nap. This means rather than nursing for nourishment (a.k.a. "draining the tank" and getting on with the show), he'll nurse on empty and sleep. So, when he falls asleep, I try to put him down to get a few things done, just a few...that's all I ask, and BAM! Those eyes pop open and he's reaching for my chest. I know, I know, it's for comfort and I'm all for that - it feels good to be able to provide that comfort but Jesus H. Smith!!! I could take a shower, clean the house (or at least one room), make some food, read something for pleasure (which otherwise I have to take a bathroom break for after Dad gets home), do my hair (rare these days), paint my toenails, or even something really crazy like take a nap myself!

Some days I do get me-moments. Today I did and I started a blog. I hope to keep up with it, even though I know I can't always make it a priority during naps or we'd have an even filthier house and no food. My friend with three little, close-together children, she writes a really super blog. When? When, my friend, do you find the time?

My husband, he's not such a worry. He'd be fine making dinner but I know it's much more fun to not have to worry about dinner when you get home from working all day, so I like to make dinner. HOWEVER, I stress myself out about it on those days Liam is insatiable at dinner-making time and is not content anywhere but the boob. Then I get behind schedule I get a little irritated with Grant like he called and said, "you better have dinner ready when I get home, or else." Why do I do that? I told him I was nutty but he still wanted to marry me.

Aside from craving any kind of a me-moment (like a shower when I'm the only one in the bathroom), I would also like to be able to stick to a routine. Ok, maybe a routine is too much to ask, but at least a plan for the day. Because of these irritations I have developed an opinion: I think, naturally, women are designed to me mothers much earlier than 25. Why? I'll tell you.

It's all about the pre-frontal cortex of your brain. It, sort of, shuts down during your adolescent to early-twenties period of life. Naturally, this is when you are taking risks like "leaving the nest" and starting your own life. You don't really have set rules about how your life runs and you're more flexible and open to other ideas. So, if there's a fussy baby trying to get you to sit in one spot for an hour so that they can sleep "plugged in" it's more acceptable. Once you get to your mid-twenties you're more set in your ways and when something throws a kink in those ways it's much more unsettling. Someone should do a study on it.

Anyway, I sound like I hate being a mom, but as soon as I hear a peep from Liam I'll be so excited to see his jolly eyes round down as his chubby cheeks perk up when he smiles and reaches for me to pick him up. After an hour by myself it just gets boring anyway.